Santa Banta Jokes

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Santa:Q: Why dogs don't marry?
BantaA: Because they are already leading a
dog's life!
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Santa falls in luv with a nurse... After much thinking, he finally writes a
love letter to her: "I luv u sister."
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Santa: "Hi, Main Bol Raha Hoon".
Banta: "Kamaal Hain, Ithe Vi Main Bol Raha Hoon!"
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Santa: I'm a proud father. My son is in medical college.
Banta: What's he studying?"
Santa: He's not studying, they are studying him!
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What's Ford?
Santa: Gaadi.
What's Oxford?
Santa: So simple, Bail Gaadi
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How do you recognize a Sardar in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the
board.

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Santa was caught for speeding and went before the judge.
The judge: What'll you take 30 days or Rs 3000.
Santa: I think I'll take the money.
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Banta ek ! sadhu se bola" Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi
upay batao.
Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?
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Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad, what should I write against mother
tongue.?
Santa: Very long!
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The Teacher asked all the students in a class to write an essay on a cricket
match.
All were busy writing except Banta.
He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"

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Inspector to Santa: Phansi se pehle, bata teri aakhri ichha kya hai?
Santa: Mere pair upar aur sir neeche kar k phansi de do!
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Santa proposing a girl: Darling kya tum mujse shadi karogi?
Girl: Tameez se baat karo.
Santa: Behan ji, kya aap mujhse shaadi karoge?

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Banta: Meri biwi mujhe chor ke chali gayi. Santa: Tu uska khyal nahi rakhta hoga.
Banta: Arre yaar, Sagi behan ki tarah rakhta tha

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Santa: What is the similarity between Bill Gates n Me?
Banta: Don’t know.
Santa: Well.. He never comes to my house & I never go 2 his!

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Girl: Will you love me after marriage also?
Santa: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.
 

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Banta joins army, given AK 47. He's puzzled & asks Major: Sir, yeh bandook ki nali samne rakhun ya ulta?
Major: Kisi bhi taraf rakho, faida desh ka hi hoga
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Santa: Bus stand jane k kitne paise?
Rikshawala: 10 Rs
Santa: 2Rs mein chalega to theek hai
Rikshawala: 2Rs mein kaun le k jayega?
Santa: Peeche baith main lekar jata hoon.

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Santa: Main aur meri girlfriend shaadi kar rahe hain.
Banta: Wow, Kab?
Santa: Meri 7 Dec ko aur uski 13 Jan ko
 

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Banta Singh Letter To Bill Gates


Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a computer for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. After connecting to Internet we planned to open e-mail account and whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ****** appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but we face this problem only in password field. We checked with hardware vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard. Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****. I request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password is.

2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the 'shut down ' button.


3. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request you to check this.

4. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friend clicked 'run ' has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so that we can click that by sitting.

5. One doubt is that any 're-scooter' available in system? As I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.

6. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ' find', but unable to trace. Is it a bug??

7. Every night I am not sleeping as I have to protect my 'mouse' from CAT, So I suggest u to provide one DOG to kill that cat.

8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning 'HEARTS' (playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to collect ur money.

9. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when u will provide that?


Best regards,
Banta Singh
 
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